Focused on What?

It has been a challenging year. But that is not the issue. With every challenge there has been a blessing.

The past year has been full of changes. But that is not the issue. Each change has brought new knowledge, new understanding, and new personal growth.

The most difficult aspect of the past year is that I discovered my focus is wrong and must be changed if I am to live a productive Christian life.

In my eyes I have always had a servant’s attitude as we are commanded to do in the Bible.

“But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." Matthew 20:26b-28 ESV

I have many times given unselfishly of my time and resources to serve the needs of others. I wanted what is right, what is good, what is best for society. I was driven to accomplish this task. But I was wrong.

I was not wrong to want to serve. I worked hard thinking I could make the difference and others would reward my effort. That is where I was wrong. Normally others only reward what they perceive as pleasurable or promotes their own agenda, not what is right. Sometimes doing the right thing meets the pleasure now criteria, but often it does not. The right thing is often hard work and requires the difficult process of making choices which delay gratification.

Yes I have made a difference, but no it has not been a significant difference. Much of my life and resources have been wasted. Instead of doing things in God’s power at God’s time, I did them in my power on my timeline. My life was too complex and too focused on bringing recognition to myself.

“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” Matthew 6:33 ESV

I have spent the past couple of days in prayer and meditation. I have been away from the demands of home and focusing on God. He has confirmed what I have begun to see during the past few months. He must be the focus of everything, even the most mundane activities which occupy my efforts and time. Now the test is if I will turn loose of past habits and make the changes which God has made so clear. I know I cannot. Only the power of the Holy Spirit will change me from my overly busy, accomplishment oriented, “to-do” list personality to God’s servant doing only what is important for eternity. Only through the Holy Spirit can I distinguish what is Sandy and society oriented from what is important for God’s kingdom. Satan is deceptive and if given the slightest opening he will sabotage my efforts as he has done so many times before.

“Then Jesus said to him, ‘Be gone, Satan! For it is written,’You shall worship the Lord your God and him only shall you serve.'" Matthew 4:10 ESV

So this life is not about impressing the neighbors and our friends with all I am doing and accomplishing. It is about living in submission to my Lord and Savior.

Lord, keep me focused on you. Show me when Satan is employing his deceptive tricks. Make it clear when my motivations for a given activity are focused on me instead of on glorifying you.

Will the Real Teacher Please Stand Up?

Two questions are on the minds of children as school approaches. Is my best friend in my class, and who is my teacher? Children know the next nine months will be pleasant, bearable, or challenging based on the answer to these questions. But who is their real teacher?

Who is exerting the most influence on the mind of your children? In today’s society this is no longer a question that can be easily answered nor one that parents can ignore. Being a parent today is so much more complex than it was just twenty years ago. Today the influences on children are not just parents, family, and friends. To keep your child safe, it is no longer adequate just to instruct your child to not take candy from a stranger. The stranger is lurking in your child’s pocket on his phone or residing in your home on your child’s laptop.

To be sure there are many things parents can do to keep their children safer. First, do not allow computer use behind closed doors. The computer should be in a very public location where the screen can be observed easily. If your child is changing screens every time you enter the room, investigate. Install filtering software on your computer. Know all of your child’s passwords. In some situations it may even be appropriate for the parent to be in total control of passwords.

Have you recently checked to see what is being said by your child and their peers on the social networking sites? What basic personal information is being disclosed to the whole world? What pictures are being displayed? Is the language and subject matter appropriate? Is your child using a pseudonym to keep you in ignorance? What are the passwords? Parents, you should know.

Phones pose just as much danger as an unmonitored computer. Do you have a filter on your child’s smart phone and iPad? These devices can access objectionable sights on the web just like a computer. Our children are very adept at texting. Are their phones affecting their mood and health because they are texting late at night thus not getting needed rest? Why do tweens and teens need to have a cell phone in their room after midnight anyway?

Yes being a Christian parent in today’s society is much more difficult than it was in the past. You say that you do not want to implement the above suggestions because you want your children to believe you trust them. Consider this. When you were growing up in a much less tech centered world and a much safer environment for adolescents, did you always follow the rules? Did you always do what your parents expected? Did you never let the influence of peers lead you to do something you should not have done? Did you keep secrets from your parents because you knew they would not approve of what you were doing? I had great parents who were proactive in providing an excellent environment and limiting my exposure to bad influences. However, I engaged in many activities which were not healthy and did not square up with my “good kid” image. Are you really willing to take the “I trust you completely” gamble? How much of your child’s mental, physical, and emotional safety are you willing to entrust to this tech infused world?

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.” Ephesians 6:10-11 ESV

So parents, and the whole Christian community, need to be vigilant in guarding children and ourselves from the evil available through the use of technology while embracing the good that can be gleaned from it for the glory of God.

Lord, give us discernment to know what is safe and unsafe. Provide us protection from evil influences through the Bible, Christian accountability partners, and our local Christian family.

My Life's Glove

Lifeless. Just lying on the dresser--

Waiting to be used.

Colorful, functionally designed.

Waiting for a purpose.

Naturally it fills with self--

Pridefully seeking gratification

Self-deception building up ego.

Pridefully doing as I desire.

Deceptively it fills with Satan

Deviously sneaky manipulation

Evil destruction reigns everywhere

Deviously creating havoc for all.

Lovingly filled by God’s grace

Bringing internal contentment

Serving others as God commands

Bringing meaning to life.

What is filling my life’s glove today?

Self?

Satan?

God?

Hurry Up

Those who know me best think I am hyper. Although I do have many of the characteristics of an ADHD person, I detest that label for me. I prefer to think of myself as high energy and efficient. I get a lot done. Never mind that I have two or three projects going at once as I juggle caring for my mother-in-law and run errands for my mother. Never mind that I seldom sit down to relax, and I never sit down to do nothing. Watching TV is a way too passive an activity for me to enjoy except on rare occasions when I am really tuckered out.

Some people are intimidated, or maybe irritated is a better word, by my need to be doing things. I am task oriented and like to mark things off my list. Lists--that is another issue. I make endless lists to keep myself focused on what has to be done today. Otherwise I get sidetracked doing the things I want to do versus the things that must get done. Of course I now have two items which are being repeatedly written on my daily list. I just do not seem to get around to doing them. Procrastination reigns if it is something I do not like to do or do not feel confident in my ability to do well.

Since May 20 this spring, I have been extremely frustrated. About the only thing I have been able to do is sit around. My left hip and leg just will not function correctly. Even though this part of my body is gradually becoming more functional, it is at an agonizingly slow pace. To do almost anything, I have to ask my beleaguered husband to help me. He is currently chief cook, dishwasher, launderer, house cleaner, and caregiver to his mother. He does not need to add meeting all my whims and needs to that list.

“Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” Philippians 2:4 NIV

Some people are so good at following this biblical advice. A wonderful, sweet older lady at church this Sunday inquired about how I was healing. I gave her the brief update of “I am doing better but am not nearly back to normal activity.” She asked how she could pray for me. I responded, “Pray that I can do God’s will—be right with him—throughout this ordeal.”

It is so easy to feel sorry for myself. My pain and extremely slow pace are so difficult. Yet I know that God will richly reward me if I stay focused on him.

“However, as it is written: ‘No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him’ — but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit.” 1 Corinthians 2:9-10 NIV

So I have to slow down and pay attention to what God is doing. He has made sure my “hurry up” mode of operation is virtually impossible.

“Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;” Psalm 37:7a NIV

Lord, thank you for slowing me down. Show me how to stay focused on you instead of the busyness of the day’s activities. Keep me close to you.

Too Old

Today is my birthday, and I do not like it. Well, I take that back. I like having another birthday—cards, Facebook birthday greetings, and a gift or two are special. Another birthday means I am still living and enjoying family and friends. However, I am having a hard time with this birthday. Turning forty was fun. Turning fifty was a big joke in my mind. Over the hill at fifty—me?—not really. But this is my sixty-second birthday. Bummer! I do not have very many years left, and I am officially old enough to collect Social Security.

Now I have to face the reality that my life is more than half over. Yes, I know I can die at any moment. But if I do not contract a serious disease or have a major accident, my expected life span is about thirty more years. That is a sobering thought. What do I want to accomplish or experience before I die? The sobering part is that I will not have thirty productive years. Health and mobility issues for the eighty-year-olds usually limit what the older person can accomplish. So more than likely I have twenty “good” years. How do I want to live them? What is important to me? Scripture makes it clear that the things we humans tend to value are not the things God values. If the next twenty to thirty years are to be pleasing to God, I must intensify my focus on Him.

“For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit,” Romans 14:17 NIV

I’m now old enough to collect Social Security payments although at a reduced rate. I guess I should be glad that money is available to me. It signals that I do not have to work anymore. Never mind that I have not worked for pay for four years now. I’ve been developing housewife skills and skills in caring for our elderly parents. I have learned so much about health care that I almost think studying to become a nurse would only be a review of my current knowledge. (That is an exaggeration, but I think you get the point.)

At some level, being old enough to collect Social Security makes me feel out-of-date, useless. I do not feel too old to be a productive citizen. I do not feel like I am ready to be "put out to pasture." However, the American society values youth and youthful leisure activities. What are we oldies supposed to do when we are too old to work? If we are too old to work are we too old to play? The entertainment industry seems to think the only way elders play is sitting back and sipping a drink. Even then, older people are often portrayed as useless and cantankerous.

I do not want to have the lifestyle of retired luxury. I do not want to sit on a cruise ship and sip iced tea. I want to be a productive, vital part of society. I want to be valued by the people around me—not looked on with pity because I cannot work or be productive.

I feel like I am thirty. Wait a minute. I have spent the better part of the past month in physical therapy because of an injury which has caused standing upright to be very painful. Maybe it would be more accurate to say I feel like I am forty-five. No matter, I know I still have something to offer those I love, my church, my neighbors, and society.

“The greatest among you will be your servant. For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.” Matthew 23:11-12 NIV

My Savior taught that we are to be servants. He did NOT say anything about retiring from servanthood at the age of sixty-two. Many of the Bible stories imply that older women are important and have specific tasks. At one point God even gives the older women specific responsibilities.

“Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.” Titus 2:4-5 NIV

So, it seems clear to me that I am to stop focusing on the age and start focusing more on God and his commands. Age is irrelevant. Worshipping God is paramount.

Lord, take my eyes off worldly concerns. Draw me close to you each moment of each and every day.

Remain in Me

I love being outdoors. I love growing flowers and vegetables. It is such a miracle to watch the plants grow and produce flowers for my visual enjoyment or veggies for my table. The modern grocery store has a wonderful variety of fresh healthy foods to choose from in the produce section. We are very blessed with an abundance of good fairly inexpensive healthy food; however, I still prefer the produce from my small garden plot. Veggies freshly picked from the garden are so much tastier than those bought in a grocery store.

Reflecting about the flowers and vegetables brought John 15 to mind. The fifth verse is one of my favorites.

"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5 NIV

In my front yard are a couple of crabapple trees. As I watched them flower this spring, it struck me that the beautiful blooms and small fruit are located on the branches—not on the trunk or root system of the tree. Isn’t that like our spiritual walk? We must be rooted in God and his love. He is the vine or trunk that supports us and gives us nourishment. I am a branch that is firmly attached to him. As I follow his commands and witness about him, I bloom in beautiful flowers of love and service to others. That love and service matures into nutritious fruit which God uses to sustain and encourage others--just as this winter I watched the birds feasting on the crabapples.

"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love.” John 15:9-10 NIV

So God is my support, strength, and nourishment. If I want to flourish I must obey God’s commands and draw sustenance from his love.

Lord, create in me an unquenchable desire to remain in your love at all times.

Let's Make a Deal

I am unhappy because I cannot do what I want to do when I want to do it how I want to do it. God, let's make a deal. You fix this problem and I will...

That is one way the scenario goes. The other common way I make deals with God plays out something like this. The problem, embarrassing situation, danger, or illness is really bad in my eyes. Only God can fix it, so I will make a deal with him.

God, if you _____ then I will…

…read my Bible every day.

…be nice to ____ who drives me insane with her selfish behaviors

…teach a Sunday School class

…never say a word in anger to my husband

…go on a missionary trip

…so on and so forth

How self-centered I am? My recent inability to use my legs as I normally do has slowed me down enough to cause me to reflect on my daily activities and attitudes. I have examined my priorities—my faithfulness to God’s commands and leading.

How arrogant can I get! I wanted to make a deal when the injury happened. Why would God stoop to making such deals with me? Why would God who has given me everything, including the air I breathe, need or want to bargain with me to get me to do what I should be gladly doing voluntarily?

How shallow can my faith be? When the deal making thoughts are written down, the shallowness of my faith in and love for God is evident. If God is calling me to behave in a certain manner, I ought to willingly do it. I should not have to experience a crisis in my life to remind me God is in control and I must obey him.

“Dear children, do not let anyone lead you astray. He who does what is right is righteous, just as he is righteous.” 1 John 3:7 NIV

So I should do what is right always--not waiting until I am in a problem situation. Not getting into the "let's make a deal" bargaining with God.

Lord, thank you for the pain in my hip and knee. Direct my activities and words. Mold me into the woman you want me to be, no deals necessary.