Puny Me

I am puny. Not that I like it nor want that descriptor attached to me. But I have to accept it right now.

From the first second I woke up Friday morning, my life changed dramatically. Thursday was a good day. I felt good, my days were happening reasonably close to what I planned, I was exercising, my yard looked good, I was keeping up on the housework and meal planning, and I was enjoying some hobbies. That all changed Friday morning when I heard Ray say, “Sandy, it is ten minutes after six.”

I was sleeping in an odd, contorted position, jumped at the sound of Ray’s voice, jerkily rolled, and came to rest in another very odd position. Pain poured through my body. Somehow I stumbled to the bathroom and then to the bed. Pain was running through my body but seemed to be centered in my hip even though my knee appeared to be rotated inward. So I "self-diagnosed" that I had a hip out of place, called the chiropractor, and arranged for my dear friend Roz to transport me to the 9:15 appointment.

The pain was excruciating, but the guilt of not being able to help Ray get his mother up for the day was worse. During a good day it takes two people to get her up. Friday morning she did not feel well and her blood pressure was unusually low. But somehow, Ray managed all by himself. At one point he came into the bedroom, gently smiled at me, and said, ”God is testing me this morning.”

“But you, keep your head in all situations, endure hardship…” 2 Timothy 4:5a NIV

The hip was not out of place by the time I reached the chiropractor. Maybe it slipped back in as I dressed. Maybe it never was out. Who knows? All I remember is the excruciating pain. The chiropractor’s instructions to ice the painful area and the administration of an ultrasound treatment did help a bit but by early Saturday morning, I was calling Janice, another special friend, to transport me to the emergency room. I actually told the x-ray technician she was running a torture chamber. I did say it nicely because I know her and respect her. I was trying to lighten the situation as I had been bawling and panting uncontrollably from the pain of lying on the x-ray table.

No broken bones were discovered which was not a surprise to me. Unless waking up in an odd position can break a bone, I had done nothing to warrant a bone injury. I was given a prescription for pain pills and told to contact my doctor on Monday. Monday morning another dear friend, Rita, took me to the doctor. He confirmed that it is not a bone issue, gave me some instructions, and prescribed more pain medication.

From my waist to my knee on my left side was a mass of pain Friday, Saturday, and most of Sunday. By Monday I had improved enough that I could recognize specific areas of injury. The major areas of pain were confined to specific locations in my left buttock, hip, leg, and knee. I realized Monday morning that my knee was numb which concerned me because numbness may mean nerve damage. By Monday afternoon it had become obvious that the worst pain was caused by muscle spasms related to the position of my leg. With that discovery, I am able to start walking using a walker as long as my body is flexed at the knee, hip, and waist. I truly look like a little old gray-haired lady when I go from the recliner to the bathroom.

I am very thankful for my Christian friends and neighbors. It has been such a comfort to know I can call on them anytime when a need arises. My heart has been profoundly encouraged by their calls and offers to help.

“But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness.” Hebrews 3:13 NIV

So to all our friends, please know it is unbelievably calming to experience your concern and generosity during this challenging time. Your love has motivated Ray and I toward having a positive outlook and inspired us to follow God’s direction.

“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 NIV

Lord, thank you for the reminder that you are in control. Thank you for forcing me to recognize the many ways you care for and bless me each and every day (even during the challenging days).