Heart Condition

“For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.” Hebrews 4:12 NIV

So what is the condition of my heart? I like to think I have a kind heart that has only good in it. But today I had to face the truth of my human sin nature. I had to admit that all my good deeds are as filthy rags when compared to God’s holiness (Isaiah 64:6). Today in church we sang the song "Purify My Heart." It is totally astounding how God times these things, but the message in this song was what I needed to handle an incident that happened later in the day. I have to admit that my heart is only pure for a few short seconds at a time. It so easily reverts to being filled with the selfish, self-directed thoughts that demonstrate my level of depravity.

I remember once during my “baby” Christian days that I told someone I did not have any sin issues going on at the time. Now that I have grown in my understanding of sin, I am astounded that I could ever make such a statement. Yes, I am a Christian and I do endeavor to remove sin from my life by the power given to me through the Holy Spirit. But every time I think I have a sin basically under control, a major temptation accosts me. That is what happened today.

“The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.” Luke 6:45 NIV

I am naturally a fairly verbal person so it is almost impossible for me to not expose my heart condition. For this reason, I study my Bible daily in some depth. I need to have God’s teaching freshly in my mind as I meet the challenges of each day. I also try to pray frequently throughout the day to keep me in close contact with God so that I will recognize his bidding and directions.

Well today something happened that opened up a deep emotional wound. It had scabbed over and was almost healed, but an innocent incident split it open again. I was hurt, vented to my husband about my hurt, and huddled up to nurse my wound. I rehearsed what I would say to the person as soon as the opportunity came.

The opportunity did come and God showed me that if I used my rehearsed speech I would be sinning. I would be speaking out of the selfish sin in my heart and not as a sincere God-worshipping Christian. I kept my mouth shut and found a way to avoid a destructive confrontation.

So as we face hurtful and difficult situations, turn it over to Jesus. Don’t let your sinful humanness rule for if you do your mouth will express your heart condition. Seek God’s direction and peace. He often uses fellow Christians to help us see past the current issues. Then look for opportunities to help a Christian friend when she needs encouragement to get through a tough situation.

“ But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness”. Hebrews 3:13 NIV

Lord, thank you for showing me that if I had said my prepared speech I would have been sinning. Please continue to grant me wisdom for my actions and patience with the persons involved in the hurtful situation. May my heart be as clay in your hands.